Unsure about marriage reddit. Oh and she also wants kids which I'm not entirely sure about anymore either. My friends are my wife’s friends and vice-versa. Kids do make things more challenging but that doesn't mean it lasts forever and this is where teamwork comes in. Though we have on-going difficulties with my in-laws, we took this time to focus on us and re-engage on our marriage. Also he already had a shit marriage, he’s probably trying to make sure he don’t have another one with someone showing him already she’s self centered. We have discussed our intent for commitment and talked about marriage. I would consider asking about the word with a screenshot on “Hungarian Genealogy Group” on Facebook. I think it’s fine is you and your friends wouldn’t care, but you can’t use your anecdotal experience to assume that about everyone else. And when we do, it’s either really dry or boring or leads to an argument. We had a short round of marriage counseling after her first overdose. Been married for 14 and a half years, 2 kids later, had health issues including hysterectomy and have been dealing with a lot of things. However, I have taken a step back from over the last y . Break things off. ADMIN MOD. I want marriage and he is unsure. 5. Some don't. A month later my mother called her mother and our parents met twice and agreed for marriage. The Nikkah is scheduled to be sometime in the beginning of January, and by then we'll have been talking and getting to know each other for a little over 4 months. The only disagreement was about how many children to have (he said only 1). My marriage feels strained and very one-sided, unsure how to cope with a wife who won't communicate or share responsibilities There's a "dad joke" I heard that goes: My therapist told me to write out a big long rant letter to everyone I have a problem with, burn them all to ashes, and scatter the ashes into the wind. No wonder he doesn’t want to marry you this instant. We’ve been together about three years and have had some issues, but have been fairly successful in working through them. A place where you can testify about what God has done. ThrowRA-peanutbutter. These issues will not go away and I guarantee you will be divorced before you hit the year mark. Im in the same position sister, but honestly being alone is better than being abused and mentally tortured, you know what im talking about. If your partner refuses to make a real effort to learn and grow into a better person then all you can do is take the lessons from this marriage and apply them to future relationships. In fact, you don’t want to sleep with other people in the first place. r/Marriage. [new] Myself (M34) and my wife (F29) got married 8 months ago. I have been working for a couple of… Change in libido and sexual dynamic is causing a strain, unsure of how to fix it. Members Online My husband betrayed me while I was pregnant and I just found out 10 days post partum. Point 2 is everyone should be looked at for themselves, you're only sabotaging your own life and others by comparing to past fiances. Admittedly, finances have me and her quite stressed out, basically the working poor but she says that I always have an excuse and that excuse in particular. Just my thoughts. I didn’t want to pay for marriage counseling because I felt so done. Engaged but obsessively unsure . And I still waited 2-3 years after marriage to have a kid. She's said she wants a divorce. 2. We make time for ourselves and each other all the time. They involved him getting individual counseling for his issues, and working on a few other things I have tried to get him to work on for over a year before all of this When you love someone, you don’t tell them you want to sleep with other people and shit on your marriage vows. It is a dealbreaker for marriage. I (26f) have been dating my bf (27m) for almost 2 years, however we've known each other closer to 10. 4 days later she said yes she wants to marry me. Together 5 years - boyfriend still not ready for house or marriage. There are hundreds if not thousands of other men who would prioritize your relationship more than this dude seems. So we aren't actually married anymore. Our life is way better without kids. We also do not live together and if we don't marry we will never live together because both of our families are religious and against it. Basically she said she figures she always was but just couldn't admit it to herself for the longest time growing up with her family being very religious, very anti-gay, etc. If he is not working by then he has to take any local job and just get on with it. I had a very rough childhood growing up shown no love from my parents. Marriage is how we tell other people in society that “this is my permanent person”. 5 years. I was totally unsure about being with him if he was missing his ex. They say ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder. You are trying to be just to your wife by not bringing a kid into a marriage you find yourself not fully committed to but haven’t fully ascertained why PS I’m nearly 40 with three kids and 15 years of marriage though about to divorce soon /r/divorce_men addresses the unique challenges facing men during divorce - from custody to assets, finances, attorneys and social issues. Award. Hello all, I could really use some advice because I am unsure of the next step to take. I’d use this time to convince my parents, who I did not want to tell about the marriage as I knew they’d never accept my husband. You’re 21, you’re way too young to be worrying about if you’ll ever find someone like him. Don't worry, life will give your relationship a challenge eventually that if you both overcome will surely spice up again your relationship, make your connection deeper or ruin it. [34M] [29F] Discovered my wife cheated prior to our wedding. We both have separate counselors. They can feel left out and unimportant. I don’t care if it’s pillow talk, have your head about you! Next time she brings it up maybe don’t say anything. He did not appreciate that I reacted that way. A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. So, my (26f) husband (27m) have been together a total of 6 years, married almost 2 years… I'm going to give a very detailed response because simple statements like "you work well as a team" or "you respect each other" aren't sufficient. He was in the military from 2019-2022. Yeah you seem self centered and like this is all about you and only you. Likely also jealous of her in general, for her talents and beauty. Whether it's long-standing baggage, happy thoughts, or recent trauma, posting it here may provide some relief. Marriage counselling is pointless, because unless she has help to manage her mental illness then your still going to have all the problems there. One time he had sat on my while trying to get my ring off and the other he had broken a table, picture frames Christian Marriage is a subreddit for marrieds, soon-to-be marrieds, daters, and singles for discussing all things related to marriage from a Christian perspective. We got to a point that things were very toxic. He is not sure how to make a decision that he does not know the answer to This would be my second marriage. We had two boys, 8 years apart. You can call 855-382-5433 for a free consultation with a licensed professional counselor 24 hours/day. My wife is unsure of our marriage because of my childhood trauma. We have a one year old. This sub is not pro-divorce, anti-women, We’ve been together now for 13 years and married for 9 years and neither of us has changed our mind about kids. I love her and have so many great memories with her, we've built a beautiful life together with an apartment, cats, and friends. He says he has unsure feelings about us and things aren’t the same anymore. I lived my whole life mentally checked out, looking at life in a distorted way and didn’t know how to separate my inner-child from myself. I recently matched with a woman on a muslim matrimonial site, we have a lot of similar My wife and I are now in couples therapy. 3 per 1,000 in 1990 to 23 per 1,000 in 2017. We don’t read the rules, but we’ll post anyway My (30F) husbands (48M) daughter (22F) is causing me to have second thoughts about our marriage __phantom__32 My [46 M] conversations with my wife [46 F] are leaving me confused, exhausted and downbeat 60% of couples married between the age of 20 -25 will end in divorce. I have friends who did that. I would really work on getting those back, putting in effort, putting in time and putting in persistence. Have that adult discussion about what you want in life and that it seems like she might want different things from you. First, I’d recommend having her realize how disgusting and vile what she did was. I also know ppl where things didn't work out in part because of things they learned as a result of living together. It's not even a conscious thing - it's years of conditioning: Men are assertive, women are bossy. I was unsure starting a new relationship, was honest about it, was even a litter wish washy/distant at first because I wasn’t sure how things would work (I was fresh out of a relationship and had two kids) he was patient and now over a decade later we’re still together and a fantastic relationship. He’s 28, how could he “not know” after two years of dating? 2. We haven't had sex or touched each other or anything since before the wedding. She said she’ll think about me seriously. Unsure of life, marriage, myself. This sub is not pro-divorce, anti-women, anti-marriage, or anti-family. I have so much on my mind it’s hard to cram all into one post. He is 31 and I am 30. well for valentine's day i decided to buy what i think is a cute little set to surprise him/ take spicy pics. Since my wife and i have been married she has never trusted me, when we met she said she was a jealous person but she hid it well and I didn’t see that side of her until we actually married, since the day we married that jealousy reared its ugly head, it has caused many, many issues during our marriage. Or tell her it’s all moving too fast for you. A marriage is, at its core, a business contract regulated by the government with a medical power of attorney thrown in for good measure. Talk to your wife? Do you like being married just you feel too suffocated? Start with a hobby where you are fully alone decide to have a some days off (single trips or anything that might fulfill the need to feel alone) have a specific budget that you both can spend as you want without discussion (depending on your means- be realistic) But Unsure what to say, I’ve been with my partner for quite some time and honestly, overall I feel unsure about marriage and being in here, I’ve seen people say that if it’s not a definite yes, it’s basically no. He has been changing a lot throughout the years especially since we have been married. He keeps being stingy with his money because he’s trying to save up for a house, but we aren’t planning to live in a house for 5+ years after marriage. Unsure about ending our marriage. Your poor indecisiveness is now impacting his life. I would be pissed. The second-highest rate of divorce takes place in people ages 25-34, but it’s declining: down from 33. Marriage counseling ASAP. I have been with my husband for over 14 years. This sub is not a substitute for legal representation or psychological treatment. Both parents understand this, both parents work together as a team and both parents make time for each other. Reply reply. From reading your post I don’t think you should marry her. My wife [36F] and I [39M] started an open marriage, I think I regret it, and unsure how to proceed. Been with my fiancé(32M) for 4 years. I honestly waited 8 years before marriage (at 30) and we lived together for 6. 💚 [OC] It’s Hungarian, I believe the word you are referring to is in reference to a profession, though I’m not confident in the exact meaning. You're right that attraction and sensuality aren't everything, but they sure as hell aren't nothing, either. Lately, I’ve been gently and respectfully questioning about when he’ll be ready to get engaged and buy a house. The word appears four times on the same page in this photo of a marriage record book. Unsure about if my marriage is salvageable It probably started diminishing a long time ago, but he's truly my best friend and I wanted things to get better. Your are very transfixed on her physical beauty tho which is kind of a red flag just a little bc while it does matter, I feel like beauty is very fickle and can be taken away any second and it should not be something that keeps my mind on someone I've made this necessity (marriage, then kids) clear to my partner ever since we became serious. We did an unofficial commitment. The wife & I celebrated 5 years of marriage this past weekend at Sandals South Coast in Jamaica. It is also his responsibility to find local babysitters so he can make arrangements if he has a job interview. Sure, in this day and age divorce is pretty normal, but marriage still symbolizes a solid commitment that even in modern society is unmatched by anything else. My wife yells a lot, belittles me, doesn’t apologize, and has made serious threats against me even though later on she admits they weren’t true and she was just angry. I (38m) might have been more prone to at one point, but the years have gone by and I'm just kind of comfortable now. It's normal like what humans feel when we are confused what to do next. Now I'm a widow as of today. ago. I am 29 years old and a full time student. Please love and appreciate your spouse, View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. I am trying to line one up now that my crappy insurance will cover. If you genuinely want to make it work, first I’d recommend slapping your wife’s father so she could understand what she did. She hasn't filed. Members Online When my mother in law told me that my husband’s mistress is leaving him to go back to her husband; I felt I could finally move on from my marriage. The 15-24 year old age range has the highest divorce rate of any age group. I've only been in one other relationship before him, and my ex-boyfriend was incredibly toxic. He has gotten more religious and although he doesn’t impose it on me he uses religious guilt when I wear Me (22, F) and my husband (24, M) have been married for 6 months now, and together for 5 years. " I was very clear with him about the time-line I had in mind for marriage and children. Let several community events occur without her volunteering. Unsure if I should continue or call it quits before its too late. I was going mad and was questioning myself so much “What’s wrong My boyfriend (29) of almost 3 years now has expressed to me that he is unsure if he wants to ever get married or have children. Sorry in advance for the long post, I've never posted on Reddit before. You are completely wrong in giving her any hope that you will be married within the year. I was also fucked up from her saying she couldn't stand to be around me I went to counseling for myself I tried to do marriage counseling with her but she went to one session and said I ambushed her between her and the therapist I spent the time listening to the therapist talk and her talk and at the end the therapist called her a bulldozer due View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. He has explained to me that he has never thought that far into the future before and is warming up to the idea but needs time to think about it. Which is the truth, from what you write here! If you’re unsure then you aren’t ready Unsure about my marriage Advice please. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now Unsure what to do Seeking Advice Myself (F26) and my hubby (M27) keep talking and fantasizing over /r/divorce_men addresses the unique challenges facing men during divorce - from custody to assets, finances, attorneys and social issues. I have been married two years (22F) to my husband (23M). Despite communicating this clearly and multiple times, my partner claims to be "open to the idea of marriage," but just that. Please call and tell the counselor your storyyour struggles are valid and there are strategies you can learn and develop for successful communication and listening skills in your marriage. Many couples benefit from slightly lower taxes when they get married. • 3 mo. There was a reason it didn't work out but you're wanting to have him plus more in any new person. Some couples who cohabitate before marriage work. I have had several conversations with him asking if he sees marriage in our future and all he can say Unsure about Potential. 6M subscribers in the AskMen community. Feeling Unsure About my Marriage. For example, I currently do not have a traditional next-of-kin. Beginning of the semi-open marriage: One quick note at some point in our marriage my wife came out as bi. It’s draining and I agree with that. If you’re not a provider, a woman will never be “ready. okay, so i know it's not a big deal but just curious about others thoughts i suppose. For starters I am (41m) married to my wife (39f) for 8 years. I have put so much money and time into this marriage. I reacted badly since I felt like I was a rebound or that I was lied to about him being over his past. You marry somebody you're not attracted to, I guarantee one of these two things (if not both) is happening before you turn 40: You're desperately unsatisfied with your marriage. I'm unsure of how to bring up marriage to my significant other. So I'm (31m)unsure where to begin except that I have a great relationship with my SO (28f) of 5 years but I'm unsure about marriage. The last photo and last vacation taken just 8 weeks ago, with the love of my life 💔. We were for 15 years. Marriage says, "I'm done looking, I found you. Men are stoic, women are too sensitive. You two are now incompatible and want different things in life. Before you ask, yes we've talked about it, twice, in detail and open and honestly. The kid part did not hurt me but him saying that he misses the friendship with his ex, surely hurt. But as we've been dating so long marriage is coming up more and more. 5 years, married about 1 year. Point 1 is leave the guy and don't ruin his life. If asked, she is to smile and decline graciously, that you guys are booked solid on personal projects. Salam I (24M) think I am in that stage where I want to begin looking for a partner but am unsure on marriage. Now, you can acknowledge that you made a mistake and still get a second chance. A mutually supportive community where deeply emotional things you can't tell people you know can be told. What a marriage means to you specifically is different for everyone, but honestly at the core it’s just a form you sign. Members Online My (38M) wife (36F) cheated on me a year ago and in response I asked for an open marriage and got it. We mutually opened our marriage (in limited ways). . I am afraid of my wife and unsure of what to do. Hopefully this won't be too rambled, so forgive me if it is. I'm a 26F and am set to have my Nikkah with a very righteous and in a lot of ways perfect guy (27M) that was introduced to me by family friends. We've been together for 3. Salaam walykum my brothers, how are you? Ramadan mubarak, may allah accept all our fasts. You have given him an opportunity and he has tried to hide in self pity. However, I lost my job and fallen into a depression. Now all those excuses have finished he’s using your “personality” as an excuse because this isn’t something you can change. Men are ambitious, women are intimidating. Oh, and everyone can have the same last name if they decided to have children. With that being said, if you truly want kids for the right reasons you can’t stay married to your wife. Hello! I (20F) have been married to my husband (26M) since this recent halloween. That hasn't happened but the timing is atrocious cause his best friend died at the end of September and it's still affecting him a lot. I have been with my husband since I was 26. So, step 1 advice, stop making assumptions and stop over thinking. I asked a friend, who is also her cousin, if she was already seeing someone and if I would like to get to know her. I thought that I was just a worrier and that marriage was, despite all the decorations, still predominantly a business arrangement, so feelings weren't that important. A place where you can pray and encourage others. ive maybe wore lingerie once it just was never a thing. He’s tired of the arguments. We dated for about 2 or 3 years before I proposed. This is a sure sign you two are not near the stage in the relationship to consider marriage. I’m kidding. I’m not sure of what is happening within your marriage, what lead up to your elopement, what your wild ways were, but what I can say for sure is that 100% of your support system have abandoned you for reasons that may hold a lot of merit. 4. It isn’t a dealbreaker for being a girlfriend. We’ve already had discussions that marriage and buying a I had written him an email detailing the things I wanted him to work on in order to mend our marriage and be permitted back into our home (over a six month period of time). A user asks for advice on their doubts about marrying their fiancé after realizing they have issues with chores, dog care, and sex life. Hi, Looking for some guidance from more experienced folk Reddit is a weird place where all social norms and basic courtesy go out the window because everyone should only care about themselves. Men are capable, women need things explained to them. He had/has a bad temper. When we began dating sex life was amazing, we were virgins and became discovering everything together. It's a place where you can share your struggles and victories. I dont think you are controlling from what i have read - just someone looking for a partner who wants to do even the mundane things with you and share in what you are building. We have 2 kids and our marriage is great. We started talking daily. We have 2 kids (7m) and (5f). The world is constructed around this idea, so things are set up to make most sense with a married couple. So my girlfriend (28f) wants to get married. I (29F) is engaged. Important, yes, but not sufficient. We did long distance for a big chunk of it, but saw eachother every weekend and every break. My husband is my best friend, and we share a lot of common interests, so we get along very well. Short back story: wife has been having the baby fever for over the past year and I’ve been neutral to wanting kids and know I’d want some in the future but I’m not ready in the sense being financially stable, that this past year I’m coming to the end of my studies and working part time while trying to change career into a new industry (motion design) which due to the current climate Christian Marriage is a subreddit for marrieds, soon-to-be marrieds, daters, and singles for discussing all things related to marriage from a Christian perspective. So a few months later, he said my coat was too small and I asked if he could get me one and he said no. One day, we had a fight and he finally told me that he actually wasn't sure about having children at all and wasn't even sure about marriage. I feel like a prisoner and I’m scared of what she might do next. Last_Chapter_6775. Originally the plan was for us to keep the marriage secret and that he would move closer to me as my job was more stable. I couldn’t imagine doing this to any women, especially not my husband’s mom even if I was provoked. Previously, I had been working full time as a model and making pretty great money at about 80K a year. ’. I have lost all trust. Members Online Wife shared her friend with me while we were dating as a bit of fun and I guess not knowing we would become an item. lilac_smell. COPD and Covid sucks. The first was a huge mistake and I had a bad feeling going into it. TL;DR We had trouble with our sex lives for years due to wife's super low libido (but everything else was generally good). He has a hectic work schedule after getting back from covid and we don’t talk as much anymore. i recently wanted to try to feel more sexy/ appealing for my husband in terms of the bedroom. Leave because you don’t want a wife, you want a roommate. I can say that I walked into marriage loving his flaws (and his dirty socks). The opposite is true too. We've come to the conclusion that we'd both like to get married, but have reservations. You have a choice but your children dont. This is the next year. Hi everyone, so my boyfriend and I have been going out since I was a junior and he was a senior in high school(!) We are now seniors in college, he… Interested but unsure I want to get to know a woman from my community. i saw a quick ad of something similar so i asked When you come home you can play with the kids, eat the dinner he cooked and do bedtime. If she gets pregnant, she can’t trust you can provide for her and y’all’s offspring. You know your partner is the right one to marry when you love them, are willing to make sacrifices for their happiness, they are willing to make sacrifices for It’s totally fair to think of divorce at that stage if needed. She's told the therapist she wants a divorce. He’s my first love and first everything. Men are organised, women are high-strung. I don’t ask for anything anymore because I want it to come from him. Pre-Nikah. Trust Allah, ask Allah to only give you whats best for you and guide you, maybe this is our test of faith, stay true and pure for Allah, may he reward us greatly inshAllah ameen (ps feel free to message me anytime to rant/advise🫶) I can’t afford to pay for two households. She's showing up for therapy. He’s a twat. My boyfriend (28M - almost 29M) and I (26F) have been together for almost 5 years (will be 5 in June). He doesn't care about marriage and even after 8 years of being with someone, still doesn't know if marriage is for him. We had to handle every shit that life could throw at us before the marriage. Maybe I'm too cautious but I don't regret it one bit. We talked about it all the time. He never had any intention of marrying you and has wasted quite a few of your childbearing years. Other users reply with their opinions, experiences, and suggestions on how to deal with the problems. While we were engaged, about 14 months ago, we Marriage is about communicaiton and compromise. So historically Ive always had a lower sex drive than my husband. However, I have seen happy and successful couples who didn't cohabitate until marriage. " Then, there are practical reasons. I had called the police on him twice. ”. She wants to trap you, and anyone who gives you and ultimatum to get married is not someone you need to be with amongst all the other issues. I think I may be in an abusive relationship. Pray istikhara and you will get your answer. A month after that she starts talking less and not reciprocating as much. Ruining the bond you both agreed to, shits on not only you, but your baby also. Husband and I (F) are both early 30s and have been together 6. But as you said, not all couples benefit financially. Our relationship is good except for one problem. I feel like I am married to a little boy. Maybe I'm having cold feet, or going through mid-life crisis, or maybe We no longer expect you to have to treat a bad marriage like a life sentence. After her second overdose, the marriage counselor said, "Marriage counseling is not appropriate at this time. Unsure what do to. kq zu wz rr jz cq yc sh un xr