My parents have an open marriage reddit. It's a huge mess now.
My parents have an open marriage reddit So basically my wife (39) found out that I (41) have been hooking up with a woman I met online who lived 2h away. That's why I immediately said that arranged marriage wasn't Islamic, it was cultural. My dad adores my husband, even wrote him into his will. An open marriage can work for some, but it’s not for everyone. My parents would have tried the arranged marriage thing, but they already failed to get me to become a doctor or engineer. I’m 19 and I can confirm that the fact my dad was 32 and went for a woman younger than me, while I consider people below my age as children, freaks me out, quite a lot Just because it isn’t for some doesn’t mean it doesn’t work for others. Posted by u/idkwhatochoose - 14 votes and 8 comments Started screaming that i ruined their marriage, that they could have worked it out if they knew sooner, that how could i have done this to them, bla bla bla. We are deeply in love and have an emotional connection. . They have finally said that it is their whole sole right to 'choose' the boy for me and that would be final. Talk to her or someone about it, bc this will stay with you and shape how you feel about things later and it may make you uncomfortable in your own relationships bc of it, without even knowing that I have lived in a different country than my folks for the past decade. The problem: his parents were married in 80s and they never got their marriage registered. Sex and love are completely different things and seem to be conjoined way too often. And when it is a special one, we do a medium sized family celebration. I went with my father because I was interested in meeting a professor that could have helped me with my career, open some doors. But I don’t think he knows that I know it. First she said that just wait till our college is over then we will marry. Step two is the arranged marriage. You need to do some research on open marriage. I feel your pain. You have a couple Nah, Quirk marriage is wrong because of the reason for the outcome (get a certain quirk) rather than the outcome itself, as well as the same issues of coercion that come with regular arranged marriages. I think "open marriage" finally sunk in. either way i ended up more of a parent to my dad and my sister. Update #5 Hello everyone, I made a post over a month ago detailing the night my wife suggested an open marriage. Not only is that my only reference point but it feels like I’ve failed them as well. My parents had me out of wedlock, got married when I was three in an open marriage, and split up shortly before my 11th birthday. I am sorry. I have no regrets, I am glad i gave my sister the childhood I couldnt have had and i gave my dad at least a reason to continue living. My parents Reading about this infuriates me. My wife and I have talked about an open marriage, and on the excitement level we both agreed it could be very fun, however both of us can get jealous and it just isn’t worth it for us. But on the way back home I asked him if it bothered him that I listened to podcasts about open marriage. My parents constantly reminded me that until they gave me away to a husband, I was still their child and would obey them, as the mouth pieces of God in my life. But the entire idea of it bothers me to my core I don't like this guy, I don't want him around my wife or children. My father was the one who asked for the open marriage but said he'd only be okay with it if my mom did it, too. My partner and I decided, 8 years ago, that we wanted to be together, but not just us, at least not all the time. Posted by u/throwramotherwdid on r/relationship_advice. You had every right to defend your reputation by telling her parents and in fact did them a favor so that they may be able to help her knowing the state of her mind otherwise it would only be lies and they would not be able to help her. But his caring was untouched. My dad was never there for either of us but the thought of my parents splitting up still feels weird. My father is one of 8. It would be an understatement to say my father does not approve. I've grown up seeing them solving marital Look you have every right to be upset at your parents. I find this Some we regret, some we are proud of - and some will haunt us forever. There was no upside. My heart just breaks for the kids and the breakdown of the family unit. My father married his mistress who allready had a son and now they have a baby daughter. But it’s really a smaller percentage than I think I would have expected because my parents and their siblings have something like a 75% divorce rate. New. My in-laws want to have say in anything and expecting us to tell them everything we do in Keep in mind, your STBX might actually be planning to cheat on you without discussing the open marriage with you directly; he's probably just told his work wife about the open marriage plan so she feels at ease with the situation. It's a huge mess now. Moved in with my aunt at 15 because my parents remarried and had new families. The first is any new partner is informed of the whole situation, family and friends are aware (without all the details obviously), the kids aren't to be aware until they are older, and dating can be as a couple or as being single. This is Reddit. While I can’t speak for all men, I can tell you why I don’t want to get married anymore; I’ve been married and divorced. It really plays an important role if relatives or someone your parents are close with have successful love marriage. I'm talking once a year or so and that's the only sexual interaction (no HJ or BJ or anything). My parents disowned me when I switched majors from computer science to business economics. Parents did not take the marriage as well as I'd hoped and ignored me for 5 years, only to reach out when they saw a 5th anniversary facebook post that mentioned our kids. She only did the ' open marriage' cause That's for our previous generation. They were financially broke the first 10 years of their marriage, battled infertility (I'm adopted), and had various other tough moments. 24 Years and 4 kids later, they're still married and there doesn't seem to be an end in sight. The sex I have with my other partners is not in away similar to or comparative to what I have with my wife. Original - October 20, 2021. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 3 years now, we started dating in high school. An open marriage you're not actually open about to your kids can look like one. I've been depressed for as long as I can remember, although I was never really depressed because of my marriage, wife or children. Top. It's not healthy for your kids to think their parents are cheating on each other. true. Here is what you need to consider. If either your mother or father were previously married, submit copies of documents showing that each of the prior marriages was legally terminated. I think it’s definitely likely that they have an open relationship because Steph probably wants it and Aisha has to except it I’m pretty stubborn and steadfast in my determination to improve myself now. Best solution i can think of is once you find someone through arranged marriage - request your parents to let you both get to know each other (date) for a year atleast before getting engaged/married. My parents (interracial marriage) have been married for over 30 years and all the grandparents are still alive except one grandfather who passed away a few years ago. Very similar is happening in our marriage. Instead, he overheard me listening to a podcast about open marriage and he commented that I listen to a lot of open marriage things. My parents have been married 60+ years so it’s not like I grew up with a “broken” or “bad” example. Basically what the title says. Also submit a copy of your parents’ marriage certificate establishing that your father was married to your mother. r/relationship_advice A chip A close button. Then once all three of you are together. My advice is to divorce and co parent respectfully I admire your strength! It took me well into my 30s to convince myself of this. I (32M) have been with my wife for about 9 years now, ENM/open for almost all of it. I was raising two kids that weren’t mine, and I was responsible for EVERYTHING!!!!! 355 votes, 100 comments. And with this comment, I can tell you that she really, really doesn't want you to have an open marriage on your side only. I have zero desire for marriage after seeing that and knowing that I'll have to be on guard always around another person lest they fuck me over like I saw happen with my parents. He told her he wasn’t happy in their marriage and that she wasn’t providing him with everything he wanted. I have a sneaky suspicion that OP’s wife was already cheating or planning to. My sister was born in 1967. He died from side effects of agent orange, otherwise he'd still be here too. I mean they didn't had discuss this job thing before planning the marriage. But according to Indian laws, they are still in a valid legal marriage because they had a religious ceremony. Not regret after marriage. That my kids would have their warmth and love every other day in their life. I’m 33. It's not because I'm not enough for him. My mom has kids from her first marriage and a few years into their marriage they decided to adopt me. studies show that 92% of open marriages fail. My husband and I have been married 7 years and for at least the last 2 years we have been miserable. Reddit Do you have an open marriage success story? I’ve been with my husband for 16 years, met him just after college. My parents are two different races, I married someone from a different race, so did two of my siblings. If you can establish that a parent/guardian has a permanent address in California, than you may apply as a California resident. Focus on how you want to serve each other and grow with each other, and try to keep fwb our outside partners on the back burner while you're going through this. My marriage ceremony was for 3 days. Can't say for myself, but my parents and practically all of my extended family have had arranged marriages. My parents are very different in terms of religion. It was so toxic. Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit him by suggesting an open marriage give her an open marriage but you have to give the divorce first for her to have that open marriage then she's allowed to go fuck whoever she wants to fuck. Get app Get the Reddit app Log this is most likely an ambush engagement and wedding. So now I can’t even go to my family’s house because my Then, she spoke with her parents and her parents denied. I go away for months at a time for a job and considering bringing up open marriage to my husband. And I would like full disclosure before I get into a relationship. Just today I got my FAFSA verification done with SSN and i have not been able to start a new 2024-2025 form because it says the same message above " unauthorised to act on behalf of student". I do not love them. Arranged marriages are still popular coz not enough people are brave enough to reject these societal norms. 😂 We are taking it slow right now, because our relationship is the most From one person personal experience, I never brought a guy home until to announce to my parents that I was getting married. My brother gets married, same shit #3😂😂😂. 🙄 Be careful what you ask for because you just might get it. Speaking as a child of a failed marriage - yes. And I definitely never told my parents that I used to have male roommates even when the relationships were platonic. your parents had sex to have you, unless you're adopted & they've had a celibate marriage. take it from me, it is NOT an environment for a kid to group up in. We have 2 kids. She is going to keep sleeping with this guy and sleep with you less. Charles II of Spain is a poor example of "cousin marriage", since he was more inbred than if his parents were brother and sister. Control. My SAHM insisted that she have help in the house. Get paternity tests for all your kids. My (21F) and my husband’s (28M) marriage was an arranged one between our parents. I decided to create a new post because part one is over a month old, the multiple updates I made were getting confusing. Please be brave! And you will be happy ever Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home. I have no desire to hang The open marriage was what made the marriage tolerable because we could live two separate lives, our married/parenting life and then our separate social lives. 7 of them got married, 2 are still with their first spouse (but one of them divorced and remarried that spouse). My mum was 16 and my dad was like 32 when they met. It had him sign and complete and I havent recieved anything saying i need to do anything. My mom remarried my step dad and they had my half sister. Rules reminder: r/survivinginfidelity is a support sub! Please read the rules and guidelines in our sub wiki before commenting. I am (F 29yo) past my breaking point on the scale of how miserable and unloved I feel. I am a fellow countryman who married his high school GF. 48 votes, 42 comments. but I was utterly oblivious to any tension in my parent’s marriage. It's not that you aren't enough. Also, I think it’s because misery loves company. People commenting about how open marriages are fine, which they absolutely are, should see if they happen because two parties are consenting like dp and ranveer , or if there is a clear power imbalance and the wife considers it an open relationship because her husband cannot stop cheating My son listed both myself and my husband (married) as contributors. He almost even called my mom a whore but stopped himself. I know it's not an excuse though, but it is true. My parents have been married for 40+ years. Get app Get the Reddit app Log In Log in to Reddit. When I talked to my wife about it her reaction was very strong. My generation tried it in the 60s and it didn't work. People commenting about how open marriages are fine, which they absolutely are, should see if they happen because two parties are consenting like dp and ranveer , or if there is a clear power imbalance and the wife considers it an open relationship because her husband cannot stop cheating My parents have been married for 53 years, most of it happily, and they never hid from me that it wasn't all sunshine and roses and, to keep a good marriage, it requires work. I left and just went to my apartment. I personally have a lot of issues between the cheating and my parents divorcing when i was young that none of this is sitting right with me. Here, Redditors in open relationships and marriages talk The woman thinks that her dad’s new secretary gave him the idea, but one day he asked his wife for an “open marriage”. My parents were married in 1969. Open marriage or not, the issues we have with ourselves and our spouse will always come to light, and it's great that you two are fighting for the health of your marriage. My best friend at the time told me that the only way to fix the relationship is by opening it up. As with most marriages, my parent's have had ups and downs, but I think the thing I like about it is that they had to learn to love - and they did. He is very open in his communication, and I also believe that it's not about me. Even though my mother and rest of the (extended) family knew, I only told my father about it 3-4 years ago. Get app Get The marriage itself introduced complexity around your parents and my parents and all that stuff. So I'm an Orthodox Jew, while we don't have arranged marriages exactly like other cultures it's essentially the same thing. I had a choice and so did my wife. Mirela As with monogamous relationships, there are often rules that people in open relationships follow so as to not hurt one another. Abuse, shaming, sexism, and encouraging violence/revenge are not tolerated here. He kept telling me my parents my village takes decision of me getting married and they will boycott him if I take a decision outside the Rules reminder: r/survivinginfidelity is a support sub! Please read the rules and guidelines in our sub wiki before commenting. My marriage only lasted 7 years despite my best attempts. Our generation needs to change this. My mother is about as religious as the average middle-aged Indian: does puja every . I think you should text them and ask you to meet them in a neutral location of your choosing. Marriage is sacred to you, you do everything for him, won't give up on him blah blah. A father: Submit a copy of your birth certificate showing the names of both parents. I know that most people say that it's far worse for kids to live with parents who don't love each other, as opposed to be raised in a divorced environment. Best relationship of my life by far and I have had good relationships. An open marriage does NOT work if there is any of the following: Fighting, toxic environment in the home. So I sat down with my bf and explained what an open relationship was. That's step one - pressuring your kid into a good career. At our earliest meets he told me I've thought about us and I cannot get married to you. If either of you really understood what that means to to have an open relationship, it wouldn’t have happened. I had a conversation with my husband about what I did. I ended up ghosting the situationship that was stringing me along with the most one-sided bullshit that I just could not get away from. I have health issues; namely borderline personality disorder and type 2 diabetes. Things have got to change. My culture doesn't have arranged marriage but my parents, extended family, neighbors and acquaintances have been blabbering nonstop about my marriage status. TLDR; I'm married to my former boss. I've heard about this "open marriage" argument from the wife before from some guys in my Group therapy. I think it’s definitely possible that they have an open marriage. Things have been fine until the past few months. In this video, I share my experience and why I hadn't spoken When I met Mirela, it was at such an event. I I have never slept with other men, and I am 100% monogamous. She ended the marriage with her manipulation and disrespect and fucking the CW. Me (27F) my husband (28M) have been married for about 2 years now. I agree that he should divorce his wife though, he shouldn’t trust her and this wanting him back is just a phase and once she has a grip on him soon enough she’ll open up the marriage again and he’ll have only wasted more time being with her. " My wife and I jsut started a open marriage after 32 wonderful years of marriage and have 2 grown kids. I just chose the wrong men and some of them didn’t lift their I am in USA and my Hindu neighbor married a Pakistani in court and parents threw a reception in India. " Three days later I was told that he and my parents thought that I should date the woman that has been my wife for the past three years. She's been distant, wrapping her head in video games and Netflix and been really lazy around the house, leaving me with all the domestic duties. Recently, our 19-year-old daughter was somewhere I wasn’t expecting her (in a different I think it’s definitely possible that they have an open marriage. Parents were worried that lot of things would get in between them, but happily married for 15 years. I'm always worried I'll get lonely enough to lower my standards again though. I started researching open marriage and poly online and I found myself very interested. They shouldn't have kept something like that from you. Being reasonable ain't the done thing here. The other day she gave me an ultimatum either open the marriage or get a divorce. So now I can’t even go to my family’s house because my ITA. sex is the great equaliser, it places you as an adult in their eyes & takes away the idea that they have experience you don't have- not always sexual, but it may also feel as though there's a transference of love & affection, i tell both my kids sex doesn I'm in my 30s and still have a joint account with my parents that they opened for me when I was 13. I (42m) don't currently have an open marriage, my wife (few years older) and I have been together well over a decade. She was my best friend. my parents arranged to have me marry a guy of their choosing from their home country. We live abroad - so parents usually don’t have much influence. Also he's more attractive and in better shape than all their boyfriends. It was really nice in college when they would send a I have an open marriage and love it. I am in USA and my Hindu neighbor married a Pakistani in court and parents threw a reception in India. We’ve been together for 7 years in total and we got married when I turned 20 so we’ve been married for 5 years. ) Communication is KEY 2. My mum was 21 and my dad was late 30s when my brother was born. We were dating for 3 years before tying the knot. There is no fixing this or reconciling your differences. There are so many times I held myself back from swearing and insulting them for telling me how I should live my life. If you're not okay with an open marriage, this is over imo. I didn’t know a lot and just figured it out on my own. Here’s the deal. There’s so many fake Christians in this world, him being a Christian man means absolutely nothing because there’s so many hypocrites in religion. My mom told me he tried to have a conversation about stopping their "open marriage" but she immediately shot it down. So far its been great, no jealousy or any real friction. I don't really look like Skip to main content. I appreciate your insight. You and I are in the same boat. My mom was a big source of support for my husband when his mom passed away (right after we found out we were pregnant). Call me selfish for wanting an orgasm one more fucking time. It askes him for my ssn, and he entered the info. You will eventually There are very strict criteria to meet in order to be considered an “independent” student when paying for school, and from what you have posted, it sounds like you don’t meet any of the criteria that would cause you to be independent (over 24, married, have dependents, are an orphan/foster child/homeless). Four years go by, we go on vacation to the country (my third time ever being there) and there I am I’m in a one sided open marriage. Obviously, I was also banned from having boyfriends growing up too. Just a relatively minor technicality, it doesn't change the fact that this relationship is not for you. There's nothing you can do about the fact that he wants an open marriage. I have an open marriage and love it. If you marry outside the caste, it will only open up more options for them. I've been in an open relationship for 3 years now. My own family, including my parents, Sarah (55F) and Michael (57M), and my younger brother, Jake (23M), felt sidelined and upset by the constant interference. She should have been honest that she would marry only if you have a govt job like her current husband. My wife was my second partner ever and we met when I was young (I was still living with my parents and about to move out), I had never got to experience a "hoe phase" or fun 'bachelor' phase which is partially why we opened up. I've personally had no issues with the age gap. I'm 32M and my parents have become frantic looking for matches for me, WHO HAVE TO MATCH MY HOROSCOPE (according to my parents). I knew they were going to, I did it anyway. I survived, I did not live. You need marriage counseling or a lawyer, and sadly even with counseling you may still need a Atleast my family is very open to love marriage because a lot of my relatives including my parents had successful love marriages. They have a good marriage and are amazing parents. Have open talks. 135 votes, 89 comments. In 17th, 18th and 19th century rural communities, people typically married within circles of a half dozen or so families who lived near each other, attended the same church, and I don't have major problems related to him. His mother and father were uncle-niece, his grandparents on his mother's side were first cousins, his grandparents on his father's side were his great-grandparents on his mother's side, and they were also first cousins, his UPDATE posted My parents are very "traditional," and I am more of the "white sheep" of the family. I know a handful of people who are 30-40’s and divorced. I don’t want to get into the ethics of this because I know it’s bad, and even though it’s their culture, their views are cruel and incredibly sexist. Stay strong. I think they only found out about recent cheating and they might have been mad because outed all those year, plus aparently i've "been playing both sides". At the time, I was pretty naive and agreed to it without much thought, thinking it was far away in the future. There's a long history of people trying this life style and loosing their marriage. There are certainly people who are looking for their one and only so they aren’t a match for dating, but there are a lot of people also in open relationships which allows me to date and keep things as simple as possible since we both already have our partners for life- our dating relationship gets to be so much more fun and light. I did love him but I wasn’t happy. Update My husband and I had some conversations about this, and we decided to open the marriage. My parents have a 17 year age gap. Then you will get frustrated, try the dating apps, get nothing. I'm in my 30s and still have a joint account with my parents that they opened for me when I was 13. We only have two rules: Always use protection. r/OpenMarriage A chip A close button. We’ve been married for 9 years. The current research (see google scholar) finds a 95% divorce rate associated with an open marriage. Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home. TLDR: My wife wants a divorce or open our marriage, because she has only been attracted to black men. I'm 54, and my sex drive has not waned. I didn’t see it coming. We proceeded to go out to dinner and have a really lovely date night. My father obviously couldn't afford a maid, so on my one day off (Sun) in a week of (6hr school Mon-Fri, 9 hrs work after school and additional shift Sat). I will not be someones option. I am not OP. I know it. Three years ago, I “cheated” on her with a ex close friend and she told me that she wanted a open marriage. My husband knows it. It’s my body and I will sleep with whoever I want whenever I want. Atleast she accepts it and wants to give divorce and move on. My husbamd got an email to accept and complete. r/india A chip A close button. Get the conversation going. It had him sign and complete and I havent recieved Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now TIL in Shanghai every weekend there is a marriage market, parents and grandparents of unmarried adults gather in a park and trade information on their Also my parents dont know that i still talk to him. I think they'll split up. I was never really into sex that much, but the stress of raising a child and my mothers boyfriends illness really did a number of me. If your only advice is 'divorce', 'dump them', 'your SO sucks' or 'grow a backbone' then please don't comment. I can never go back to my home country taking a European white guy back to middle east is not a good idea. My wedding was is in 2nd. But, I don't know. My wife is the happiest she is ever been, too. Went into it with eyes wide open. It's a little harsh to assume someone's parents will die early in the marriage. I really want to have a halal relationship and I know that if the father doesnt have a valid reason to reject then you can get married without a mahram, the only issue is the guy's parents wouldnt like it if he marries me without my parents being involved, it looks bad in our culture. It's just how he is wired. It’s a great life. My other partners are people I fuckto be frank. They also have a great circle of friends. I’ve personally not seen one work. Two reasons her parents gave to my parents, 1st caste and 2nd Now, my situation is completely different, but I did come from a family that kept the past secret. Meaning he doesn’t want to put forth any work. I will edit my previous comment and change arranged to force as it will be clear. She told me “I want an open marriage. It may also help bring the two of you back together, but there is no guarantee of that. I’d be so tempted to say, “I didn’t ask to be born to someone who didn’t want me/to you,” to really drive the point home. He actually really gets amped up at the thought of me with someone else go figure. We make a great team: parents of an amazing kid, jobs we love, a home we love, we both make art, etc. It didn't go very Having grown up my whole life this way, I didn't even know the law would have been on my side if I had decided to defy my parents and move out when I turned 18. I have always seen so many guys family with demands in our community, they had zero demands. On finding out, his knee-jerk reaction was to threaten suicide. On the contrary. You also know you spent a good chunk of your marriage in the military. My cousins are married, have kids, etc. My dad cheated on my mom for who knows how many years, all the while maintaining the facade of the perfect family life. And no, my husband is not open minded to the point of agreeing on an open marriage. My (15M) parents (38F) and (39F) are in an open relationship with my best friends (16M) parents (40F) and (43M). I still love her tremendously but our sex lives has gone from "occasionally" to pretty much never. It seems impossible to have or be something like that. This sub-reddit is intended to caution people of the hazards of seeking to open their marriage or other long term relationship, and to advise users that have been pressured into such. None of my friends in long term relationships have anything like what my boyfriend and I have and they all say they wish they did. Hello. She asked she got it. To be fair it wasn’t always horrible. The All I can remember is how alone I felt during that time and was too afraid to speak to my parents about how I had it, they were always smiling and seemed to have the perfect marriage while My wife and I have been married for 22 years, and have had an open marriage for the past 10 years. I think it’s definitely likely that they have an open relationship because Steph probably wants it and Aisha has to except it. Share Sort by: Best. Wedding vows mean nothing. Right before that though, my (ex) husband was able to meet with my dad (who’s always liked him) and told him how I cheated on him and then insisted on having an open marriage when I got caught. In fact I had met 24 other "prospective partners " arranged by the family. But it's conditional. job, she denied all. One day my Rabbi said, "I think it's time for you to get married. We recently married last December after 6 years together. Well, 2 months into his married life, he meets all of his friends (including me, his school friends, all from different castes and religions) and shamelessly proclaims how arranged marriage is the best and that too caste based arranged marriages as he feel like he's married a family member and the transition/adjustment was much easier due to So I 16. They met in Harvard , parents didn't agree ,so, did court marriage. Best. Such a thing is never an option for me. I’ve known for some time that he has been with other women. Of course, we don't know what the future entails, but Open or poly relationships only work if both people are fully okay with it and embrace the lifestyle As it stands, you're technically just allowing your gf to cheat on you while you carry her straight to the men she wants to have sex with. My parents are like from a movie (also a very attractive couple) but yeah it's not the norm. My brother married his college GF. I also said no not interested but she brought up the idea a few more time with the same answer. We have been roommates since. The child I was before and after my parent’s divorce was very different. For context Open marriage is not infidelity. My husband is 45. My wife of 10 years did the same to me. Open comment sort options. Each one of our parents has been married twice and we have more years if marriage then all 4 of our parents marrages yet they think we It’s frustrating reading when one partner wants “an open relationship” and one has to be convinced. Don’t ask don’t tell When ask why she wanted this she informed me sex was now boring and wanted someone to fuck her hard. My parents are supposed to be highly qualified and open minded but believe that they would pick the right boy for me to whom I'll adjust eventually. He wouldn't lie to me about The parents could have easily dropped the marriage offer and waited until their daughter felt comfortable and ready to start a family but they insisted and used their parent-child relationship as a threat. Expand user menu Open settings menu. Does it mean that I as parent have to fill a separate form? My daughter has filled in her form and has not signed yet. Now in my 30's and wanting to have kids, I would have loved it if my parents where close by. But that being said, you shouldn't have called your mom that word. I always call my parents on their wedding anniversary(58th)- and they always call on mine (29th). My parents got divorced, and it honestly make my life a living hell. r/IAmA A chip A close button. The quality of discourse on Reddit has really declined in recent years. Back in 2018, my cousin brought his girlfriend of 10 years (school love) and her parents to home for marriage talks. She agreed to forgive me if we opened the marriage but now I live in agony every day. My parents have just about that age difference and I thankfully have both of my parents around. They even waited for a year. It just popped into my head and had never occurred to me before. I am difficult to live with. Now she sees her choices blowing up in her face. I sent my parents to meet her parents (they know each other) but her parents denied to my parents on their faces. The thing is that no matter the circumstances of a child’s conception, if an adult accepts the responsibility of parenting that child, the adult also has a responsibility to be a good parent, and one of the bare minimum attributes of good parents is not We have been married for 12 years, three years we decided to live an open marriage and it has been awesome. That fact that OOP puts down her friends and their partners while simultaneously bragging about how perfect her relationship is, is very telling I cheated on my wife three years ago. Married Women of Reddit . I love her so that is not the problem but the idea of adding something new enticed me. I have been married for 20 years and have always viewed open marriages as a ‘hall pass’ for infidelity. One day my parents told Wow, great job. My parents said when they got divorced (around when I was 18) that they should have got divorced six or seven years previously. Some we regret, some we are proud of - and some will haunt us forever. Since then, there have been ups and downs and many conversations. We have had the best communication over the past three days, as well as INTIMACY! I want to cry I'm so happy. He created this whole false sense of reality to cope. He explained to me at the wedding that they have pretty clear rules about their open marriage. A very genuine, traditional guy I love him to bits. I found out my parents had an open marriage 10 years ago during my sophomore year of high school when my parents sat me down and told me that my dad’s girlfriend was pregnant. (yes, I know about Zelle and Venmo). My father entered into a polygamous marriage when I was young, and I thought it'd be interesting to hear from people whose parents are/were in an open marriage like the ones described in Your parents’ open marriage is their business, not yours, and “dealing with the consequences” of it is something for them to work out without #redditstories #reddit #audiobookGrowing up with parents in an open marriage can be challenging. ) Be totally honest So, first go read the best of reddit updates, it will have people opening marriages and it imploding. Plenty of people have unfavorable quirks, and society helps them with it unless they're selfish pieces of shit like Toga who take what they From what I’ve seen, opening the marriage sets up an expiration date for the marriage. Me(25m) and my wife(35F) are currently in a open marriage. You're basically my age and you still have many decades of life ahead of you. The info my husband completed is from our joint return so I am thinking that is We have been married for 10 years and everything is going great. My husband (M 40yo) doesn’t really want to change the dynamics of our relationship. Our sex life was really amazing but recently it had begun to lose it spark. This only works when you have a really solid trusting relationship and you can be 100% open about involvement with others. ” I can’t live like that either. And now we have been married for 3 years, we aren't from the same caste/region/family When I told my parents I want to marry a guy I know and who I love (another caste), they are trying to convince me to change my mind so that I talk to the guys they found for me. Why? They don't know. If someone doesn't want to marry your siblings because you married outside the caste Marrying outside of your people is Sunnah, racism and cultural prejudice is not. I was 16, and he was 23 when they forced us together. When the woman visited we checked into a My (21F) and my husband’s (28M) marriage was an arranged one between our parents. Long My mother did not have boundaries and the older I got the more open she was even in front of my friends about sex and my father and her sex life. We lived with my parents. I was married almost 35 years when my wife informed me she too wanted a open marriage as she put it. Stay strong! My mother's grandmother was the product of a chain of first cousin marriages, and my father's paternal grandmother was descended from a single Miller family 9 times. When I was 12 or so, I was in bed when it just hit me. If my husband had asked to open the marriage I would have been packing his bags for him, I don't think there's any coming back from that, they've just told you you're not good enough. He loves cooking so do I. r/Marriage A chip A close button. My parents' marriage is amazing, but I have seen all other family members and realise how incredibly rare and lucky I am. My wife and I have been married for 4 years, we have a 3 year old. Our relationship has never been stronger and we are very happy. One and a half of those have been married. So, I (19f) have been told that I have no say in my marriage whatsoever. The majority of my close friends married outside of their ethnic groups. With our similar situation, I ended up cheating on my side. It was really nice in college when they would send a I am too facing this issue. My world was turned upside down by their divorce and I resent that my father didn’t stay with my mother. Even the US embassy's website in India says that performing a religious ceremony means that you are legally getting married, despite no registration. How he thinks it’s a secret to me, I don’t know. He did. My son listed both myself and my husband (married) as contributors. That's all fine, but he does not feel the same about you. I [29F] have been living abroad for 7 years and have been in an interracial relationship for most of that time. The basic rules: 1. Opening a monogamous relationship often leads to disaster: a literal FAFO situation. The parents were married My (24M) wife (27F) and I have known each other for 7 years. I felt I had no identity in my world. The parents arranging the marriage may also have an arranged marriage and there is the extra We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. With her asking for an open relationship your marriage is too far gone for Reddit to help. My husband also adored him, really tapped into that father figure need since my husband grew up with a horrifically abusive alcoholic father. My (22F) parents have been together over 30 years now and have had 6 children, me "You have a parent who has a permanent address in California, but you live part- or full-time with a parent who lives in another state or country, or you attend boarding school in another state or country. Mom being the older one. But since he didn't get any govt. As soon as we got married, my bank account was drained. Heck, my parents eloped and got married in 1970s coz my maternal grandma never agreed to the proposal. It means I have mood swings. All those 3 times I cheated happened in the heat of the moment, and I wasn't thinking straight. It makes it easy to transfer money for things like the cell phone bill, travel, etc. Some marriages start open. Now you've found out she's cheating it's a definite divorce. It depends on how close the family is. I am too becoming 26 this year. The no always wins (meaning if one is uncomfortable and says no that stands, no questions, no reason needed). In my experience, there are no issues so long as nobody puts their culture above their deen. owdsetqqyhzcmhsephetazdefneznxqcjbfbuxlmgrlbwxfim